The Lone Leader Weekly

10th May 2023

Finding Balance Is A Discipline.

Balance can only be achieved by understanding what’s important to you and tolerating the discomfort of it all.

#1. Curiosity Killed The Cat But Not The Entreprenuer.

The moment you stop asking why, you are on the back foot.

#2. Ai Won’t Fuck Up Your Life. 

That’s on you. Use it like any tool to supercharge your talents.

#3. If It’s Not Serving You. Kill It.

Relationships, thoughts, partnerships, habits, products, hobbies.

When we take a moment to understand what’s most important, we shed the baggage of what we think we should be.

Over the past two weeks, I have been given a chance to reflect deeply on life due to losing a close friend. While all loss of life is a tragedy, it’s what we take from those that have gone and their impact on the world that is most important, so in some way, their time on this planet made a difference.

Last October, I made some significant changes to my life, family and business, but I didn’t realise that it provided a set of rules I now find myself living by (imperfectly, of course).

One of the most exciting things I have observed is my deep desire to strip things back, make things simpler and cut away the noise. As you can imagine, this is no small task when you have 43 years of baggage. But I made a critical mistake at the start.

I tried to do it all at once.

Example list for Monday:

  1. Save the world
  2. Be the fittest I have ever been
  3. Make my million
  4. Spend time with family
  5. Sleep 23 hours to reduce the effect of ageing
  6. Have the perfect diet.

Now I know this is ridiculous, but it’s not far off how my brain works, i.e. I suck at being patient! Which I think many of us can suffer from.

All of the data says that we are most likely to fail if we take on too much at once and don’t create a system for change. Also, it needs to have meaning, a WHY we want to change, then HOW we want to change. As per James Clears‘ insights – who is the person you want to become?

So here are a few wins to prove the point in the past 4 weeks since I moved house:

  1. Walked the dogs every day at least once (missing one day)
    1. Makes them happy and fitter
    2. Makes me happy and fitter
    3. I get to explore the local area
    4. I get to listen to podcasts as I walk.
  2. No phone in the bedroom at night or in the morning 
    1. Stops the doom strolling before sleep
    2. Reduce blue light
    3. Stop being triggered by the world as soon as I wake up.
  3. Stop reading all news media (Past 2 weeks) 
    1. I am now not consumed by the negativity that captures the entire world
    2. I have more positivity to control what I can control
    3. Less anxiety
    4. My time/energy are focused elsewhere, which is productive.

NONE of these insights or actions are perfect or complex. And they are 100% possible for all of us to embrace.

But I have found that they are easy to continue if I understand the value of making the changes in the first place. The list of benefits far outway the negatives of these changes.

You can apply this thinking to any part of your life; the benefits are crazy—time, energy and capacity to think more clearly.

In this complex and stress-full world, we all need to take the time to find a ‘dog walk’ strategy that makes the intolerable tolerable.

And this is the first homework for you. Create your own Qualify, Compound, or Kill list for any part of your life and commit to it for 14 days. Here’s how:

Qualify:

Ask yourself what you are doing that you shouldn’t or don’t want to be
Ask why you are doing those things – BE HONEST
Ask yourself what systems you need to put in place to create more chances of success
Ask what kind of person you want to be IF you make the change.

Compound:

Focus on what works for you, current good habits, and why they stick
Identify what you love doing that you want to do more of
Create a list of your superpowers and apply them to your life, business, hobbies

Kill:

Stop the things that are not serving you – why? To make time for the things you want to do
Observe your behaviour when you slip, and correct it quickly – Miss a day, but never miss two days
Remove, edit, stop – Apps, routines, habits, doom strolling

Give it a try. See how much more capacity you suddenly have…

When we try to do something new, we tend to squeeze into what we already have, reducing the mastery that you need to be great at something. 10% of 10 things is not the same as 50% of two things.

We only get better when we focus, but we only become great when we focus on something that has meaning to us.

As Lone Leaders, we are always on the back foot, with so much to do and so little time. So stop. You are the boss; you make the rules. Stop.

You didn’t get into business to be busy; you got into business to have more choices.

Until next week. Qualify, Compound, and Kill.

G.

What next?

Subscribe to The Lone Leader Newsletter

Every Wednesday morning, you’ll get 3 actionable tips to elevate your thinking, life and business to where they should be.