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The Lone Leader Weekly #005 – The Universe Doesn't Give A Shit
The Universe Doesn’t Give A Shit.
About New Year’s Eve.
#1. We all need a purpose.
Yes, you need to understand why change is important, but the value is in the action, not the why.
#2. Act small, think big.
The unpleasant truth behind a life that is as it is supposed to be is that the process is mundane, daily, small, and underwhelming.
#3. Hold two states of mind.
Lose with grace. Win with humility.
ARTICLE: The Universe Doesn’t Give A Shit About New Years’ Eve
The most important question is – do any of these important moments in my life link directly to a societal tradition of short-term transformation?
Full Read – 4 Mins
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About Grant Difford – Founder of Waking Giants
The Lone Leader Weekly #010 – Fight The Battle. Win The War
Quiet Courage Is All Around You.
Getting on. Not complaining. Without an audience.
#1. Expertise x Honesty.
Your growth will come from deeply informed and brutal facts in a world of gloss and no substance. This is the seed of resilience and the path to success.
#2. Give Up On Guilt, Not Yourself.
We use guilt as a weapon against ourselves. Not enough time, not enough attention, not enough, not enough. To give up on guilt, you must first understand what is most important to you and do it.
#3. Face Reality. No Matter The Pain.
When we are backed into a corner we have two choices; we crumble and fall or we make a plan and start swinging. You may still lose, but you won’t regret trying.
ARTICLE: Half Of The Art Of Living Is Resilience.
It is not lost on me that life is hard, damn hard. But we assume that most have it under control. It’s a myth.
Full Read – 2 Mins
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The Stockdale Paradox – Waking Giants
The Stockdale Paradox was originally brought to life in the Jim Collins Good To Great book on what it takes to make average companies extraordinary.
Interestingly the Stockdale Paradox isn’t widely known unless you are a fan of Jim Collins, which is somewhat of a surprise as the principle is pretty straightforward and applies to all aspects of our lives.
The easiest example I can think of is the following:
“You go into an important meeting to land that next big project. All goes well, you are feeling pumped when you come out, life is good, and you know the deal is going to come through. But then, that reality check that the universe likes to play with you. You have a parking ticket for $200. At this moment your brain triggers your emotions as this is a negative, a pain and that’s where we will bask for the next hour. But the Stockdale paradox says that we need to have context, let me explain.” (This is a very trivial example, but we humans currently crave triviality!)
The Stockdale Paradox is one such concept that, at first glance, takes some mental wrangling to fully grasp.
Jim Collins found a perfect example of this paradoxical concept in James Stockdale, a soldier, one of the highest-ranking naval officers at the time, who, during the Vietnam War, was held captive as a prisoner of war for over seven years.
During this period, Stockdale was tortured with no reason to believe he’d make it out alive let alone get home. Within the grim awareness of his reality, he found a way to stay alive by embracing both the harsh reality of his situation with a balance of healthy optimism.
Stockdale explained this concept as the following:
“You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end — which you can never afford to lose — with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.”
The simplest explanation of this paradox, it’s the idea of hoping for the best, but acknowledging and preparing for the worst.
The ability to acknowledge your situation (awareness) and balance optimism (growth mindset) with realism comes from an understanding of the Stockdale Paradox. This contradictory way of thinking was the strength that led James through those trying years. Such paradoxical thinking, whether you consciously know it or not has been one of the defining philosophies for great leaders making it through hardship and reaching their goals.
Whether it’s weathering through torturous imprisonment in a POW camp or going through your own trials and tribulations, the Stockdale Paradox has merit as a way of thinking and acting for all creating an aware and conscious life.
Because, reality check, not everything is going to be rosy, all day every day. But, if you accept the principles of stoicism from leading thinkers like Ryan Holiday, there needs to be a healthy detachment from our emotions to create acceptance of our daily reality.
It also flies in the face of unbridled optimists and those positivity peddlers whose advice pervades nearly every self-help book or guru spiel out there. Those Instagram ‘celebrities’ that are in no uncertain terms deeply misaligned with reality and try to convince you of the same.
Stockdale Paradox and to your daily life
We want to be successful, happy and fulfilled. Reaching this state of fulfillment isn’t going to come just by a positive mental attitude. That’s all well and good and it makes us feel nice. It’s why so many people like to listen to the endless gurus and motivational speakers promising us the world if we only just learned to change our mindset or buy the course. But what they leave out is the need for self-awareness and action towards something that moves you in the first place. Because fulfillment comes from meaning.
Confronting the situation is instrumental for success. There’s a bit of positive attitude required, but it needs to be counterbalanced with the thought that you can fail and actually be better for it. There are countless examples of situations that seem hopeless and turn out more abundant than one could ever imagine as illustrated in The Pursuit of Happyness. Your wildest dreams just might come true. . . that’s the paradox.
It’s not about choosing which side to take, but instead learning to embrace both feelings in opposition to one another and realise they’re necessary and interconnected.
How to apply the Stockdale Paradox in your business
When it comes to business leadership and creating your vision, this dual state helps to guard against the inevitable disappointments that will hit you in the business world. Optimism drives innovation, but that needs to be put in check to ensure that you’re playing in reality and not heading towards something that can’t happen.
It’s a tool to keep yourself grounded, but also entertain the idea of being incredibly successful.
The Stockdale Paradox can help any leader to improve their situational leadership and plan accordingly to tackle the challenges that will arise. It builds resilience through both the idea that you can be positive and believe you will overcome all difficulties while at the same time you are confronting the unpleasant facts of your current situation.
The awareness of your reality is what causes the fear and shuts down the momentum required to reach the positive outcome you want.
So when you next get a ticket, or indeed something doesn’t go your way. Give it context, look to the future and move on. Remember all success is on the other side of pain.
There are no shortcuts.
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If you want the advantage of purposeful strategy within your business, get in touch today.
Cam Wilkes – Waking Giants
Business Blogs, Branding Insights and Case Studies
Top 10 Tips For Business Evolution – Waking Giants
Business Evolution: You can’t turn up each day and expect everything to simply happen the way you want it to. Below are some key tips for making ‘it’ happen.
1. Forget about the business
Stand in front of the mirror and look at what needs to change. Your business is an extension of you. Either change the way you do things or accept your business will not change.
The culture, attitude and results of your business start and finish with you. Think limitation, excuses and scarcity and that is what you will get. Think opportunity, abundance and expansion and you will get that too.
Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, either way, you are probably right – Henry Ford
Ninety-five per cent of what we do all day every day is a conditioned response and involves no new thinking and no creativity. To change, we need to break our cycle of conditioning. Not a straight forward task, but it can be done.
2. Stop planning and start doing (stop doing your MBA or anything similar)
Edward De Bono refers to an MBA as mentally below average. He does so for good reason. MBA’s teach you yesterday’s strategy. It doesn’t help you today.
Your clients don’t care what three-word abbreviations you know or that you can put together a powerpoint presentation. They don’t care that you know what headings and content you should put into your business plan. These things are of no use to you and of no interest to anybody else, except maybe your bank manager when you need to tick some boxes for your business overdraft.
While you are at it, throw out all your business plans, five-year strategic plans and forecasts too. These are about as much use to you as reading last week’s newspaper to find out what you are going to do today.
Instead – just get started. Nothing attracts energy like movement.
3. Self-reliance: don’t follow someone else
While you are at it, throw out all your management texts and biographies as well.
Envy is ignorance; imitation is suicide – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Reading about some over-complicated theory about what somebody successfully did in the 1980s is about as much use to you as following the lemmings over the cliff.
Half the companies in the book “From Good to Great” have been through the Fraud Courts in America and have failed. Read what Jim Collins says about Enron in that book versus what he is obliged to say later in life.
Don’t follow the America capitalist model. America is the Wild West for a reason. Once they killed all the Indians the Cowboys moved to Wall Street.
What somebody once did to fleece money from their client and to pull the wool over the eyes of their stakeholders is not a sound business model for you. Are you that person? Are you that company? Do you live in the same market? The answer to all of those questions is always no, so why copy any of them?
What Jack Walsh did at GE or what Richard Branson has done to keep himself from bankruptcy time and time again is irrelevant. Don’t try and copy Warren Buffet or Bill Gates.
Be reliant on yourself first and foremost. Don’t be complicit or docile.
The opposite of courage in our society is not cowardice, it is conformity – Dr Rollo May
4. Get organic
Our intellect has convinced us we are above the law of nature and are the sexiest things on the planet.
That is the biggest con job in the history of business.
Apply this simple test:
Take the biggest, most industrialised sophisticated modern city in the world and abandon it for 50 years. Go back after 50 years and see how quickly nature has absorbed the whole lot.
The more artificial, more unnatural you try to be or to make your business or product then the greater your chance of failure. In fact, your failure will be inevitable. It may take some time but nature will do whatever it can to rebalance things and destroy your business.
Nature doesn’t create layers of process and middle management. Bees don’t work only if they have a flowchart directing what they need to do.
Nature doesn’t allow for vacuums and it doesn’t allow for structures or entities that are out of balance or unnatural.
Be sustainable. If you are not then you should not be in business. If everybody on the planet lived like New Zealanders, we would need 2.5 planets just to keep going.
5. Stop thinking and start feeling
We confuse mental activity with thinking.
Feeling and longing are the motive forces behind all human endeavour and all human creation – Albert Einstein
We listen to our monkey mind too much and our intuition too little. We are encouraged to be logical and rational. Our education system and the industrial revolution condemned free thinking, creativity, and individual endeavour. Yet it is from our passion, from our feelings that true creativity arises. It is our imagination, not our logic that solves problems and creates our future.
Since Plato, Aristotle, and Socrates we have been taught to be logical and this encourages competition, judgment, and close-mindedness. We are dissuaded from being open, collaborative and compassionate.
6. Be connected
Stop texting and start meeting.
Welcome to the connection economy. We need to approach our work as art. The value we create is directly related to how much valuable information we can produce, how much trust we can earn, and how often we innovate.
If you use your money to buy advertising to promote the average products you produce for average people, you will soon run out of money. But if you use your money to make exceptional products and services, you won’t need to spend it on advertising, because your customers will connect to one another and bring you more.
The industrial economy cherished compliance and competence.
The connection economy has made competence not particularly valuable and has replaced it with an insatiable desire for things that are new, real and important. The connected economy prizes achievement. Achievement comes from a culture that celebrates the achievement motive. In countries and regions and moments of time when there is a cultural imperative to make art and to move forward, things change for the better.
Are you supporting this shift with a business culture that encourages both yourself and your staff to dream important dreams?
Seth Godin
7. Be authentic
Gandhi’s wife was once asked how her husband managed to speak for hours on topics without notes and without ever contradicting himself.
She responded that for Gandhi that was simple because everything he thought, said and did were the same. She said that for us mere mortals these were three different things.
We need to be Gandhi.
We need to realise that the age of bullshit is over and what we think, what we say and what we do need to be one and if they are not, we are going to be found out. If we are not authentic in everything that we do then the market will respond to us accordingly.
8. Don’t waste time trying to find your purpose
Do what you are doing today really really well. That will be enough to get started.
Sorry to break the news to you, but you weren’t put here for some special higher purpose. You don’t have to build a thousand-year legacy or be the one to find a cure for cancer. Those things are nice, but not essential. They are delusions of your ego.
But what you do need to do is to live and live well. Don’t confuse going through the motions of life as living. If you are only going through the motions you are a corpse with a pulse.
Live with energy and passion. Life without limits and boundaries. Treat each moment and each encounter as a new opportunity. Do things that are different and do things that scare you every day. Be kind and help others.
9. Keep it simple or be stupid
Life is not complicated. Our intellect has made it complicated.
Do yourself a favour and get simple. Get real.
10. Slow down and have fun
We spend too much time trying to earn money we don‘t need to buy things we don’t want to impress people we don’t like.
It takes us too long in life to realise we are not measured by the bottom line of our business.
So slow down and have some fun before it’s too late.
Live, laugh, love, cry, drink some red wine. Tell jokes and make yourself the punch line. Make your mind and body healthy. Eat well (and understand what that means), exercise and take the time to just be.
Remember:
Health is the greatest possession. Contentment is the greatest treasure. Confidence is the greatest friend. Non-being is the greatest joy – Lao Tzu
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What Is Servant Leadership? – Waking Giants
Servant leadership is a leadership style in which the goal of the leader is to serve those around them. It is different from the traditional leadership style where the leader’s main focus is profits and growth.
With differing needs in the workplace, a “one leader to rule all’ does not meet the need of the future workforce who are looking to be “part” of something not just a cog in a wheel.
Traditional leadership depends on the use of perceived power and hierarchy, whereas servant leadership puts your focus firmly on what’s best for the people that work alongside you.
No longer should we be using terms like human resources or human capital. But see those that we serve as part of the journey towards purposeful outcomes and success. If we create people-driven businesses through servant leadership by very definition, we create companies that serve and generate better outcomes.
The accountants no longer define success through numbers, but our people through continuous growth and development, nurturing, and open communication will actually drive successful businesses.
As a leader it requires a shift in mindset and to serve first, you benefit as well as your employees in that your employees experience endless personal growth, while the business naturally grows and evolves through increased engagement and a sense of purpose.
Servant leadership is driven by a key set of skills and mindset adopted by those who lead. It isn’t a case of just being a bit nicer and saying yes to every demand, but an awareness that you are dealing with people and their most basic needs allows you to understand where they stand and where their passions lie.
As a leader, it’s dangerous to expect your team to care as much as you do about your business, but that doesn’t mean they can’t care enough to make a huge difference. Your job as a leader is to bring the best out of people and put them in a position to succeed in both their work and personal lives.
There are a few things that you need to have in your leadership toolbox to develop your servant leadership style:
- Look at your motivators – are you passionate about developing talent?
- Are you self-aware and do you expect the standards of yourself as the same as those that work alongside you?
- Be humble. You are not supposed to know everything.
- Do what you say you are going to do.
- Focus on results but share why you are trying to achieve them.
- Always be looking ahead for bumps in the road to protect your team.
- Listen to hear not to respond.
- Ask for help and praise those who know better.
- Coach all day every day but set expectations.
- Be vulnerable but not weak. Show you are a person too but also lead with conviction to provide confidence.
Being a servant leader does not mean you are a slave to your team’s needs; in fact, it’s the total opposite. It is being aware of them and guiding them, which creates growth and positive outcomes for all parties.
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The Naked Rebellion: Episode 1 – The Rebellion Has Started
After two years of a pandemic your mind starts to ask new questions, about humanity, politics, health and your own thoughts.
In this episode I share my thoughts on how The Naked Rebellion has come into existence and how, in some small way it will give humanity hope. You don’t have to get naked and you don’t need rebel, but you do have to ask new questions.
Welcome to The Naked Rebellion.
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