The Lone Leader Weekly

29th Mar 2023

Have The Courage To Go All In

Because the pain of regret is worse than that of failure.

#1. Embrace Failure.

If you don’t try because you are afraid of failure. You lose. But if you try because you might fail, you’ve already won.

#2. Being First Isn’t Important.

Being the last person standing is.

#3. The Truth Hurts. Make It Loud.

When the universe provides you with a lesson, it’s rarely wrong. No matter the pain or the friction. Listen deeply, then act relentlessly.

The fear of the unknown is more traumatic than the unknown itself.

Anxiety is defined as:

‘A feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease about something with an uncertain outcome.’

More importantly, it is a state that we find ourselves in more and more often in life and specifically in business.

If you had seen the relentless posts about AI and Chat gpt 4 on my LinkedIn feed over the past two weeks you would be too scared to leave the house.

It is yet another attack on our sense of calm and control; no matter what your business or skill, you will be replaced in the next three weeks without hope or consolation for your work today.

You will be made cheaper, quicker and better. In fact, there’s every chance your family will replace you with AI, because, well, why not. Thats progress. Hop onboard.

Ok, so I am being a little childish, but I’m probably not far from the truth when it comes to our sense of value and how change affects us, both good and bad.

New beginnings was a thought that came to mind as I spent the weekend packing and emptying our current home so that in a week’s time we can start our new lives.

What prompted the idea for the article was that I found myself getting very sad and nostalgic about the whole process.

Not just the finding of old photos and items that show you a glimpse of the past, but also the reality that there is something big and new on the horizon.

We have spent five years developing our little farm, and it was only last night, as the sun went down, my wife and I stood on the deck and took in all that we have achieved here as a family.

As I held back the tears, there was nothing but pride, but so much of the journey is hard to remember and the deflective statement I keep making that ‘this is only a building’, is ultimately a lie.

Beyond the physical aspects of the property that have seen us invest so much blood, sweat, and tears, there are the experiences that we gained.

A short list includes:

1. Birthing lambs
2. Raising cattle
3. Rescuing a pig
4. Raising pigs for the freezer
5. Learning to hunt
6. Two of Millie’s birthdays in lockdown
7. Planting orchards
8. Raising chickens
9. Our first Golden Retriever litter
10. Becoming ‘horsy’ people

Personally, well that’s another story:

1. Cancer
2. Burnout… at least twice
3. Running my first ultra-marathon
4. Changing my business from what I could do to what I wanted to do
5. Growing my first e-commerce business to $100,000 p/a
6. Reconnecting with my Dad after a long time apart
7. Having to watch my best friend move to the other side of the world
8. Watch a 9-year-old lose the fight to horrendous terminal cancer.

And like I said, twice again as much forgotten.

My anxiety about our new beginning comes from being so grateful for such amazing five years of living a very special and humbling life, a life full of challenges, laughter and tears.

I genuinely thought I would be able to walk away without a glimpse back, but I was wrong. These experiences and these memories are the foundations of the next stage of our lives together, and I should feel them deeply because they have all meant so much.

But here’s the kicker, the new beginnings are about something bigger than this building; these experiences, are about our daughter Millie.

Last year she came to us and said that all we ever did was projects (working on the property) and that we didn’t spend enough time with her.

That hurt. It hurt more because I was an only child, and I know how it feels to be lonely with busy parents.

This whole journey is about a commitment we made to her to ensure that her childhood is full of experiences and memories that, one day, make her proud and shed a tear.

New beginnings with meaning, with purpose outweigh any practical compromises.

Our move will see us change our lives for the better. For each one of us. But mostly that in 20 years, there won’t be resentment of ‘what if’; it will be another chapter in our family book that shows our commitment and values for each other.

These past five years have been hard, with so much energy and sacrifice, but now we see the reward. We are financially secure; we are moving to a place where there is nothing to do but be together and embrace all those things we put to one side.

We have changed our businesses, so there isn’t so much stress in the house, I am more present and available and have the ability to say YES. More.

I know many of my friends and clients are going through change and that there are a lot of new beginnings on the horizon.

Selling a business to be able to spend more time with his kids, a new vision for life after the loss of a property in the cyclone, becoming an international specialist, not just a great vocalist, making physical changes to live a longer life and the ending of a relationship… all changes that come at a cost, full of fear, full of doubt, but you are doing it anyway.

Because your mission is too strong, the pull towards a better future means you have to suffer in the short term to create the long term.

When you have a purpose for your life, when you have something that makes you want to wade through the mud and the shit and still keep going, that’s worth living and fighting for.

The unknown soon becomes the known, which soon becomes life.

Have the courage to step into the darkness; the obstacle is the way.

Until next time. Courage, dear friends, courage.


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